In the end I only kept fifty one shots.  A good number were repetitive.  And while my camera is a mighty fine one for sticking in your pocket - and has an excellent battery life, good stabilization when I'm not using a tripod, and great low-light and macro capabilities - the optical zoom is only like 3x.  And the digital zoom just doesn't give professional looking results.  Which isn't so bad in good circumstances, but I was trying to set up out of the way, so I was a bit of a distance off.  Hence a number of shots were also just too fuzzy for my taste.

But anyway, it was a fun experience.  It made me long for a real tripod (my cheap one broke aftewards when trying to re-compact it into portable size) and a real SLR 10+ megapixel digital camera.  For a presentation that wasn't pandering to any cameras, I think I got some great shots for what I had to work with.

It kind of makes me wish I could do that kind of stuff professionally.  I think I have a good eye.  But I'm too engrossed into the computer programming career to just jump ship.  Besides, if I did jump into a new career, it'd probably be something more like running a pagan / new age shop.  That or a crossdresser, clubwear, and sex toy store.

Yeah, I know, I'm crazy.

And then I've always wanted to be a writer...

[caption id="attachment_146" align="alignnone" width="405" caption="This is one of my shots of Colleen Scully from Better Homes and Gardens. She is kinda cute."][/caption] ]]> http://wiccanwanderings.wordpress.com/?p=373 Sat, 11 Oct 2008 20:11:07 +0000 The Green Witch http://wiccanwanderings.pt.wordpress.com/2008/10/11/being-brave/ Both myself and Seshat have been battling both negative opinion, recently; and the rot hasn't rested with us.

We find it takes proper guts and resolve to stand up to your detractors; it's all too easy to be a yes-man, a people-pleaser, and to keep the peace and the general status quo intact by bending, breaking possibly; and for what? So you can be broken again, afresh, to bleed again from new wounds when the sacrifices made cease to be enough for the rapacious hordes at your gates? I think not.

Seshat gave me a present, yesterday. Along with the fun, the laughter, the companionship which is ever-precious to me, she gave me a thing she had made in circle. On it was a house, a tree, an armoured animal; it smelled good, it had substance. It is now under my pillow and I feel the strength, the stubbornness, the tenacity and the drive it contains from here, and I'm ten feet away from it. It is inspiring me.

I have been doing work myself with sigilisation; I'm really enjoying the elegant and elemental shorthand and the focus it requires. For me, the smaller and more intricate the sigil, the better it works. I use a draughtsman's pen and thick paper, and I need to be in the right frame of mind, obviously; my palms burning to create. Once made, the sigil is admired once, for posterity, then burnt and forgotten. This on the priniciple that a cake won't rise if you keep opening the oven door.

Thank you Jesus, Mary and Joseph and all the saints for your loving care and protection. Thank you my Gurdian Angel for watching over me and keeping me safe.

Faith Is Stronger Than Fears

Sometimes my cross is hard to bear for there is darkness everywhere,and troubles pile around my door like autumn leaves forevermore.

The morning light seems far away,like I am stuck in yesterday,My heart is beating like a drum,I try to pray, but words won't come.

But then the sun begins to rise and hope is born within my eyes.A rainbow forms among my tears,my faith is stronger than my fears!

Author Unknown

This is the first time in weeks that I have been able to relax enough to really let myself go and drift once again to those places within. With that comes the pull of those places far away. Though I find myself in my new home, my soul still hears the call of those places that since childhood hold tight to me, like the arms of a loved one with a waiting embrace. I wonder now if I will ever answer that call, as life often pulls us in different directions. There is a deep longing in me tinged with a sadness I cannot explain or justify to anyone. I should be deliriously happy to be in a home and settled, and I do love my home and realize just how fortunate we are. Perhaps this is not my time or my life to wander and what I feel is something left from a life past or something waiting for a life to come. My heart and soul have been waiting a long time and I have been given many gifts in the last two years. Now I am restless for more. Life is a journey from one road to the next and I have to believe I am here for a reason and those things that call to me will find me, or I will find them one day. At that moment, maybe I will remember this and it will all make sense.

The end of October is coming, faster than I would like to believe and with it comes the beginning, for some of us, a start of a new year and new hopes. There is a strong energy around me now, and perhaps this is the reason for the emotions I am feeling. Those things I connected with so strongly are now coming back to me, now that the dust has settled. It is a good feeling, that feeling of connection, and I welcome it no matter what emotions come along for the ride.

Morning is a time when I fill with words, often spilling them into the pillow, but sometimes getting them to these pages. Perhaps they are just the ramblings of a tired woman, but maybe someone out there hears me and it makes just a little sense to them. The dog calls, the cat is perched on the highest point of the wall like a vulture looking down on prey, and there are failed foil masks littering the floor from my Halloween King who is now fast asleep. Life calls and for now it is here. My bed calls as well, and it is time for sleep.

He taxes too much. If you vote for him you’ll be homeless. If you vote for the other one, your children will starve. But if you vote for the first guy, they’ll lose all their education and become stupid rejects, begging for day-old scraps behind the ghetto bakery. But the other guy will take your job. And the other one will tax your new raise so you actually come home with $5 less every week. One of them will date your mom. The other will shut down her nursing home. One will have dinner with terrorists at Arby’s while the other just sends him a check at Christmas, even though they don’t celebrate Christmas.

Here’s what I’m saying: There are bigger issues than whose face is on the front page. Every day 6000 kids are killed by mid-term or later abortion. They refuse to allow Bibles in schools, so Christian parents teach home school, allowing their children to learn math and moral values at the same time. While the schools are taking a massive dump when it comes to value and ethics and crime and teaching self-worth, the state of California just outlawed Christians from their God-given right to teach their own kids. Now they have to send them to the cesspool of a school that will teach anti-creation science, thereby infringing on the rights of students to practice their own religion freely (but don’t worry, they won’t attack Muslims, Buddhists, atheists, agnostics, pagans, wiccans, Scientologists, etc. Just the Christians.)

Let’s see, what else? Lets talk about gay marriage. I’m all for gays to have the right to choose their lifestyle- its their choice. (Just like my kids schooling used to be.) But I’m not for the whole gay-marriage thing. Sure, they can practice it, but that doesn’t really make it a marriage. I know, I know, they’ve redefined what “marriage” is, but it used to be a union before God between a man and a woman. Since most homosexuals don’t believe in or care for God, they can’t really have a union before Him that He will honor. But, what they hey, they ignored my right to practice my faith (only if it’s from the Christian Bible) by ignoring the 1^st amendment, why not ignore the other principals too.

So who is going to do what to help me out? Am I personally going to benefit from either party being elected? Maybe, but probably not. There aren’t a whole lot of things that are going to actually make a difference in the way I daily live my life. I could be wrong, but here’s how I look at it:

If one side is accused of overtaxing and the other of allowing abortions, I will sacrifice a couple bucks, even a couple hundred, per year to vote for the sanctity of life.

If one side is accused of sending jobs overseas and the other of limiting free speech, I’m probably going to have to go for free speech. There will always be a need for jobs on the US. They may not be the best, but we have too many people not to need a ton of jobs. We also have a lot of politicians going after free speech, even though the ones attacked are the churches and the right. Hmm.

If one side wants to build a thousand mile fence at the borders and the other wants to let gays marry, I will go for the fence. Those guys are great climbers and if they can get in through, over or under a military fence, then they deserve to stay. For those that can’t, they can still come here, but have to go through the legal process. Meanwhile, I stand up for what I believe regarding gay marriage. I’m not anti-gay, but I’m not pro-gay. I’m just ok-gay; they can do their thing, but I don’t want tax dollars going toward something I find immoral.

Bottom line, I can’t do anything about the politicians. But, then again, I will probably never have to answer to them. I will, however, have to answer to God. I will stand before Him and be able to say that I voted for the things and the principles that are on His side, His Law, and His eternal purpose. I will say that I stood up for hundreds of thousands of innocent children and supported their right to life. I will say that I voted against the activity that led to His destroying Sodom and Gomorrah, the activities that He calls an abomination. I will be able to say that I stood up for His Word, His teaching, for the right to exhibit by faith, to speak freely the gospel. I will say, “Jesus, I stood up for you.”

What do you stand for?

Chapter Four: On Sexual Conduct

1. Sex is a gift of the Gods and is to be enjoyed by all concerned, as
often as possible and desired, but especially during Weekends
and High Holy Days.
2. Any sexual act physiologically dangerous or impossible to any
participant is forbidden.
3. Sexual gratification may not be used for coercion, nor coercion
(physical or non-physical) be used to obtain sexual gratification;
such is a crime against the Gods.
4. No restrictions shall be placed upon the sexual acts of any partici-
pants upon the ground of age, species or sexual preferences; save
where danger to health and/or arrest is imminent.
5. All bonded partners are expected to provide sexual satisfaction to
each other (if desired) at least once every week, or to arrange for
surrogate partners to provide said satisfaction.
6. It shall be considered uncouth for any member of a bonded group
to forbid or hinder any other member of the group from seeking
sexual gratification outside of the group.
7. Matters of hygiene and conception are the responsibility of all
participants involved in any sexual activity.
8. No gender in superior to any other; therefore sexual chauvinism is
uncouth.
9. A person of any gender may participate in any activity desired or
refrain from any activity dislike, regardless of traditional cultural
gender associations with specific activities.

Other than my increasing decent towards senility, a few other things have changed since Wiccanfest. I don't sleep in tents anymore. After getting quite sniffly whilst camping in Bouillon Belgium for my first LBW I have vowed to never tent again. And this time round I am to sleep in the warm confines of a cabin. Hopefully they will be more luxurious than the "50s soviet potato farmer's holiday camp" that Paluse was.

I am also more of a tightwad, so I am not shelling out the dosh for a meal plan that is purely vegan (I needs me meat) and makes no accomodations for my lactose-intolerance. If I expect to have a pleasant weekend not latched onto the seat of a latrine I must provide the susitence myself. The lack of accomodation is one reason the other reason is that I refuse to pay an exorbitant amount of what will in any event be a selection of toast, rice, pasta with some sauce and salad. I have loaded up, instead, on pot noodles, carrots, crystal lite (low calorie drink mix), pierogies, diabetic chocolate brownies (non-lactose), and peaches. I do believe I shall be hungry still, but not starving, so I should be able to survive until I return to civilisation and a fridge full of different varieties of pierogies, kepta duona (lithuanian fried bread), some dinner leftovers, chicken tikka, and delicious grapes.

I plan on taking pictures, if allowed, of all the cavorting pagans. Should be fun and interesting - I hope.

Just walking into the Co-op felt like therapy, or a warm bubble bath— filled with Epson salts and lavender. I bought cheesecloth to make a spice bag, baggette and blue cheese, and goat brie to delight Nora and I, and vanilla macaroon granola mostly for myself. *purrs and remembers the smells of the Co-op*

Amazon and I left, wandered our way to Ross @ the Palouse Mall, and she discovered pretty black, lacy lingerie. *grins* It was cute to see her try it on. I found a strainer for Cinnamon Coffee, a bamboo cutting board and matching knife set for Nora(our anniversary is tomorrow) and we both looked at journals for Turtle. Our last place was Waldenbooks, where we kept nixing journal ideas, to girly, too frilly, to busy, to nice, until Amazon slid around the corner to me, as I was drooling over a wooden, gold-leaf journal, a black based journal with colored robots all over it. Perfect. And we got 20% off on it, so it only cost the both of us $7 a piece. It was a nice find, and shopping is very therapeutic.

We both went home, and I discovered Nora in our parking lot, just getting home from babysitting Thursdays. *breathes happily* Turtle dropped by with R and J, to pick up the journal I’d been holding for her, we all chatted for a bit and then they left.

I shuffled my tarot cards between my hands, back and forth, dashing cards between cards every once in awhile, dropping the deck, picking it up, shuffling conventionally, getting to know my cards. When I felt ready, to do a reading for myself, I went into the bedroom, cleared off and made the bed, rearranged Cooter, Jenny and Jr. into comfortable spots behind me on the pillows. I laid out my candle circle on the top of the dresser, re-working the circle a few times till I laid down a red lid, poured sand from near Vantage, WA onto it and squared the candles out to 8 with the 9^th off centered in the middle. I laid my wand, my sword and my spector across the sand, zig-zaged beneath it, and placed my bone-goddess pendant on top in a place which felt right. I lit the candles starting at the head, clockwise and ending back at the head. I used both matches and a lighter, as the lighter began to spark. The alter glowed. White, vanilla candles glowing with warm, yellow flames flicking on top and within. My spector-wand laid out, with my sign inscribed visibly below it, and the goddess pendant seeming to move in the flicker-dance of the flames.

I lit the last, three wicked, vanilla, house candle and almost prayed, I chanted. I questioned the cards, “How do I heal, How do I heal, How Do I heal?” questioning on my in-breath and “relax”ing on my out-breath. I saw green light, the green of the candle marked healing at the Co-op, flowing around my hands, around the cards, and in and out of my breath. Then when the question made it into the cards, I charged the cards, turning them from the side, to face down. As I charged the cards, I visualized an orange-red or warmth, a warm yellow, flowing into the cards, giving them power and giving me power to look into my subconscious with the cards as my guide. Then I released the power and it dissolved, warm, dry mist into the air, into the comforting smell of my bedroom.

The cards told me of my own nostalgia, with the 5 of cups, about the possibility of a previous love returning into my life, or of dwelling on memories right now, the place where I’m at. My crossing card was the Queen of Cups, and as she gazes, I am ambivalent, not uncaring, but torn between two directions, which muddle my clarity. My crowning card I don’t remember, but the Base of the Matter turned over the Knight of Cups, reminding me of a deep seated desire for romance, and a belief in the ideal of love, telling me to remember and see my own need for romantic, or courtly love. The card of Past Influences made me laugh, b/c it told me summer is over, it’s time to put away the desire for fresh fruits and veggies, and sun dancing, and begin to think about the sensual, fall aspects of myself, b/c summer is over. I laughed b/c yesterday was the first below 30 degree day we’ve had this year. Obviously summer is over. Still, I hear, indulge my sensuality, and I fear my sensuality lately. The card in the 6^th position was the Page of Wands, atop the golden fleece, telling me of my own restlessness and creativity beginning to stir around and bubble in my mind and fingertips. The card reminded me, that while not all creative ideas are good, to not discount them, often the beginning ideas, are the spices, stirring into the pot, which begin the delicious process of cooking. The card telling me where I am right now showed a place of celebration, 6 or 7 wands. A place to take a minute, celebrate and reflect and get ready for the next assault. My 8^th card, how my Family and Friends see me, was a remarkable position of power, The Queen of Pentacles. She holds aloft a golden pentacle, and a bounty of grapes in her other hand. It’s a place of power and visibility, often of sexuality. A revered position. What to take away from this? That while I feel like I’m drowning(though less so after my reading and calming), others see me as succeeding, as pushing through, capable of making it out alive and better, whole. My 9^th card in the spread, Hopes and Fears was expected. It was Zeus, arrayed in purple, the Ace of Wands, telling me again of my restless creative energy and warning me of my fear of success. I hope to succeed artistically, and I also fear any success. It told me unless I trust in myself and the decisions I make, I will easily fall. By my own hand, not by the hand of others, as most failures occur in my mind. (I recalled this entire spread from memory, and know I missed one card, but I don’t know where.) My last card, my answer to “How do I heal” was “You must be torn to bits, because you keep helping others and can’t seem to help yourself, so your limbs will be torn from your body, your memories ripped out, and you will experience a death of sorts. Then, then only, when you are broken down, may you heal. So welcome the pain as it comes, but do not revel in it. Feel it and let it go.”

I thanked the cards, wrapped them carefully in their cloth, and blew out the candles widdershins before calling Nora to bed.

The reading and the breathing and the candles helped me. I glowed for most of the evening, and I woke up this morning at 7am, ready to write about it. Now, I will curl up, savor my tea and gaze out into the grey morning. What an English way to start it all.  

Chapter Fourteen: On Dealing with Outsiders
1. Other Pagans should be treated as sisters and brothers.
2. Heretics are potential comrades; it is couth to talk to them.
3. Skeptics are fun; have several as friends.
4. Cynics are a plague; avoid them as such.
5. Fanatics are dangerous, for their hearts are closed.
6. Beware the tarbaby of experience.
7. Carry a long spoon wherever you go.
8. Be neither showy nor overly timid, but remember: nobody likes a
missionary.
9. Be careful about seducing their children.
10. Be cautious in telling them unpleasant truths, especially about
themselves.
11. Never expect them to live up to our standards.

All the same, I have just completed the filing of an entire course in palmistry I wrote for "Enhancing your mind body spirit" magazine / partwork some years back.  Loads of articles, I think around a 100 "lessons" in all all neatly in the right order.  I took some random photographs of some of the articles I did, as well as the piles of photographs and uploaded it to my facebook photo album.  It surprised me that I got more than a few messages from people commenting that they were surprised that I had written on palmistry - "Why?" I exclaimed, "its what I have always been into!!".

In fact that is true.  I remember my grandmother reading my palm as a small child and and an uncle on the other side of the family who was (I think) Romany who also used to read my palm the few times I met him.  Though my interest in magick certainly did not stem from my interest in and studies of palmistry, in retrospect I realise that it must have played a role.  After all, your palm is like a map of your destiny - and well, it was probably written in there somewhere.  Also, the four elements, the seven planets and all kinds of other magickal symbolism play an important role in the analysis of the lines, shapes and feel of a palm.  If you understand all the basic glyphs, you are well on your way of doign a scientific hand analysis already - just with a picture like this:

This is a photograph of an article I did which shows photographs of the four elemental hand shapes.  Again understanding the four elements of Air, Fire, Water and Earth and their attributions will give you a headstart on understanding this component part of palmistry!

Yet - for some unexplained reason, palmistry is not "cool" amongst modern witches and pagans - who all instead prefer the pretty pictures of the tarot.  I understand the appeal, yet - for palmistry you need nothing but your own intuition, your knowledge of the correspondences and a palm.  It is the ultimately "portable" system of divination as a result and one which you can use in every day situations.

Knowledge of palmistry is having knowledge in the palm of your hand - always.

I have been thinking about religion lately.   With the current financial melt down and the bail-out, I imagine that religion is on a lot of people's minds.   How many people do you think are praying that Pelosi loses her seat in Congress? Right now, how many people are on their knees saying, “please, Jesus, may Obama keep just one campaign promise”?  Maybe people are praying that their jobs are not outsourced to the mysterious East, or maybe they are praying for the safety of a loved one in Afghanistan or Iraq.  The Almighty must hire a legion of angels simply to keep all the prayers organized.

What really puzzles me is how the Almighty decides which prayers to answer. For every person who prays that Pelosi loses her seat in Congress, there is at least one person who is praying that she keeps her seat for the sake of his mutual fund portfolio.  For every Democrat who prays that Obama wins the election, there is somebody praying that the dark-skinned man with the funny name loses the election.  For that matter, for every American praying for a serviceman, there is a very angry Iraqi or Afghani praying that God smites the invaders.  So just who does God listen to?  When there is a choice between two sides, does God flip a coin?

There are religions out there who think they are really slick and they try to bribe God.  Pagans and Catholics will light candles and burn incense in order to entice God to see things their way.   Voodun will sacrifice a chicken.   For the life of me, I cannot imagine what God would do with a dead chicken.   I suppose a chicken sacrifice is as good a way as any to make chicken soup. What I would like to know is if their prayers are answered more often than Protestant or Jewish prayers.

Another thing that really puzzles me is why people argue over God.   I recently saw a quote on an Atheist website that said something about arguing over who's make-believe friend is better.  That's what it comes down to. Muslims claim that Allah is supreme.   If so, why are Christianoids rocking and rolling through Iraq and Iran?  Christianoids claim that Jesus is Lord!  In that case, how come a bunch of Arab hillbillies managed to utterly pants us and destroy the World Trade Center?   If Jesus or Allah were actually the high poobahs, wouldn't you think that one of them would put his divine foot down and say, “that's a no-no”?   More recently, there is a huge tempest in a teapot over which gender God is.   Is God a woman?

Another mountain out of a molehill is the amount of Gods there are.  God is one.  God is a pantheon.   God is male.  God is returning and She is pissed.   It amazes me to see what people can argue over.  In the cosmic scheme of things, we have more important things to worry about than the existence or non-existence of somebody else's make-believe friend.   We have real life problems going on right now.   Who cares if your make-believe friend is male or female?   Who cares if you have one huge almighty make-believe friend, or a whole storybook full of them?

If we are going to spend all this energy over a being or beings who probably does not even exist, why don't we agree on a nice make-believe friend.  This is why I have decided that I am directing all my prayers to Hobbes the Stuffed Tiger.  Could you think of a better make-believe friend?   He's loyal, he tells the truth, he is a comfort during the bad times, and a faithful troublemaker during the good times.   Hobbes gives good advice, but he's there with a warm hug when you ignore the good advice and Suzy gives you what you deserve.   At the same time, Hobbes has never smitten anybody for his sins. He has never killed anybody's firstborn kids, or commanded wars.   (Well, maybe a snowball fight or two.)  Best of all, he's a stuffed tiger so he can just as easily be Hobbesette.   Could you think of a better God than that?  There is no God but Hobbes and Calvin is his prophet.

Screw you, Pat Robertson.

]]> http://anneliez.wordpress.com/?p=261 Wed, 08 Oct 2008 16:06:40 +0000 anneliez http://anneliez.pt.wordpress.com/2008/10/08/mysticfair/ Vorige zaterdag zijn we naar de Mysticfair in Het Land van Ooit geweest. Omdat het de hele week koud en slecht weer was, hadden we afgewacht tot vrijdagavond om de knoop door te hakken of we zouden gaan of niet. Zaterdag bleek de beste dag van de week te zijn en beloofde koud maar droog te worden.

Zaterdagvoormiddag vertrokken we dus richting Nederland voor een dagje vol fantasy- en paganstuff. Het Land van Ooit is vorig jaar failliet verklaard, waardoor ik eigenlijk ook wel benieuwd was naar wat er van het vroegere park gekomen was.
Toen we aan het park aankwamen, viel het ons op dat er nergens parking te bespeuren was. Vreemd voor een locatie waar een pretpark geweest is... Even polsen bij een medewerkster van het event leverde het antwoord dat het verboden was gebruik te maken van de parking. De organisatie vond het erg vervelend en de bezoekers moesten dan maar een plekje in de buurt zoeken.

Door het slechte weer was het niet zo druk op de Mysticfair. Er stonden leuke kraampjes, maar het grote grasveld wat het hart van het event moest worden, lag er erg drassig bij. Gelukkig was de grond voor het podium droog, want we waren van plan enkele optredens mee te pikken en hadden niet veel zin om in de modder te staan...

Omnia zou om 14u de spits afbijten. Omnia was present, maar er waren problemen met de opzet en het geluid, waardoor we eerst konden lachen met de grappige conversaties en toestanden tussen podium en geluidsmensen.
Het optreden van Omnia was erg leuk. Zanger Steve praat muziek en songs vlot aan elkaar, de muziek is goed en het is leuk om hen om het podium bezig te zien. Na afloop van het concert hebben we meteen een paar cd's van hen gekocht. Omnia is een populaire groep in het genre en is vaak terug te vinden op de muzikale affiche van fantasy, gothic en medieval events. Toch zijn de bandleden zo spontaan om na het optreden handtekeningen uit te delen en op de foto te gaan met fans, waardoor Vee en ik nu elk een door de volledige band gesigneerde cd in ons bezit hebben.

Na het optreden van Omnia hebben we nog een beetje rondgeslenterd op het terrein voordat we naar het optreden van de Mediaeval Baebes zouden gaan kijken. We waren ondertussen echter zo bevroren van de kou, waardoor het idee om in een warme auto richting huis te zitten, de bovenhand haalde en we toch maar vertrokken zijn.

Mysticfair was een leuk initiatief, maar had erg te lijden onder het slechte weer en andere onvoorziene omstandigheden. Hopelijk hebben ze volgend jaar meer geluk, want ik vond het wel jammer voor de organisatie.

Het slechte weer zorgde er voor dat er zo goed als geen spectaculaire outfits van bezoekers te zien waren. Het optreden van Omnia heeft daarentegen wel voor leuke foto's gezorgd. Zie Flickr voor de hele fotoreeks van zaterdag!

Liez op een soldaat uit Napoleons leger

Heks en Vee

Stijn past een hoge hoed

Jenny met bodhran

Luka met slideridoo

Zanger Steve

Jenny met harp

Ik denk dat dit hun jongste toeschouwer was :-)

Beloved Brigid, Celtic Fire Goddess

-A testimony

Brigid is the powerful Celtic Goddess of fire I will tell you how it is I came to know her by fire, twice!

It was Imbolc and our coven was meeting on Saturday evening to honor the chosen Goddess Frigga since the following day we were holding a separate Goddess Temple service to honor Brigid and the Sabbat. 

Since it was February and close to Valentines Day we chose Frigga instead of the first thought of Aphrodite or Venus as our symbol of Love.

We adorned the altar with red white and pink candles, cloth and figurines’.

We placed a picture of Frigga on the altar and then went into the other room to get our coven together.

While we were “checking in” with each other the smell of smoke was wafting through the rooms to us. We ran into the other room to find flames and smoke so thick you could not tell the ceiling form the floor.

We all pulled together and ran in and out of the room extinguishing the fire and trying to get the smoke outside

The fire was contained to just the altar table and the carpet under it. Everything was burned or melted on the table, everything but the piece of paper we had printed out the picture of Frigga on and set in the middle of the table! Yes, a plain piece of paper sat in the middle of the altar engulfed in flames and did not have a single mark on it.

After everyone was calm and the room was smoke free we sat and determined that Brigid did not like us honoring another Goddess on her day and she left the picture unharmed as her note to us. The room was cleansed by fire and the day will forever be known as Brigid’s day and none others.

The next day at our Sabbat service we had a fire roaring in the fireplace and many pictures were taken. When I was putting the pictures from the day online I noticed in the pictures of the hearth and fire there was an image! There is an unmistakable image of Brigid in the flames wearing a crown/veil and all!

She had come to be there with us that Imbolc day as we honored her properly. I had never felt so moved in my whole life and so sure that the Gods/Goddess’ are here with us everyday and that they are always with us when we call upon them.

I still have and will forever hold dear to my heart the photo of Frigga with a small splatter of candle wax as the only mark of the fire and the picture of Brigid in her Imbolc flames. Brigid holds a very special place in my heart now and forever.

Scarlet Imprint

1. Always be careful what you ask for; you may get it.
2. The ability to divine that which is hidden is a gift of the Gods;
therefore, all those who have such talents should use them for
their own benefit and for the benefit of those seeking counsel.
3. No one form of divination is superior to any other; all are equally
blessed by the Gods.
4. No diviner is infallible, and to claim to be such is an uncouth
deception.
5. Divination and Magick are hard work; therefore, it is allowed to
ask for recompense for efforts made for nondruids.
6. It is uncouth to use Magick upon another sentient being without
their express permission; except in case of war or in case of an
ability to give permission caused by unconsciousness, youth or
inability to understand one’s offer to heal.

Here are some links to meal blessings to say either privately or out loud with the rest of your family:

Pagan and Buddhist

And remember, everyday should be one of thanksgiving.

Holy Order of Mother Earth;

Our Lady of Te'Sorthene parish

This is what it should look like

• The temple will be a house, in a residential neighborhood on a busline.
•  A 2 story house with the bottom living area walls broken down so it is just a large room that can be used for meetings. weddings or funerals. I want the walls lined with books available to borrow or read.
•  It should have a large yard with space for a food and herb garden, a beautiful large outdoor altar, and a place for outdoor weddings and rituals
•  the upstairs to be an office, and at least one guest room that could be a birthing room, and one room that could be a meditation or small group chapel, or counselling room.
• The kitchen to be fully functional and many folding tables and chairs so we can feed as many people as we need to.
• The basement should be lined with shelves and can be stocked as a food pantry.

Every full moon we meet for the evening or afternoon, not to be preached at, but for a meal, for working in the garden for talking and prayer. If someone has thoughts to share they can talk to the group. We check in with each other and fill what needs to be filled. We reach out and help those that need, whomever they are.

This is just the start of my vision, but I can see it so clearly..more later on the spirital principles.

I am indeed a witch.

It seems strange to have to make such a statement but to be honest. I think it is the first time I have. I have always considered myself Pagan. I have taken on many of the principles of Wicca. But I have always been shy of labeling myself. Why is that? I really do not know. I am not sure what made me hesitate in admiting to myself what I was.

I have begun to think more and more about my beliefs. I have an interesting journey ahead of me but one I look forward to.

I am a Witch. I don't own a black cat. I don't have a broom, I will stick to my vacuum for cleaning up thank you. I do have tarot cards which I read for insight. I have an Athame and swords but the swords are collectible.

I have a library of books about Wicca, Magick and I am writing my Book of Shadows which I started just after returning from Queensland and the Australian Wiccan Conference. I wish to learn all I can. I wish to grow as the seasons go.

I am a Witch.

I just thought I would clarify it and express it.

I am a Witch and I am happier as one.

Don't judge me on just the word. Judge me on my words. Judge me on my actions. Judge me on who I am and not on what you think I am.

It is a term that means so much to so many. We are all here on the great planet and those who call themselves Pagan, Witch, Wiccan, or any of a dozen other names know how valuable life is here for us.

What makes our way special is the ability to be ourselves. We do not have a doctrine that has evolved to be oppressive. We are not ruled from on high by a man or men who have seemingly lost the plot. We do not cry out for war in the name of our Gods though we have Gods who are warriors.

It is easy to be judgmental though. Easy to feel you are right and another is wrong. We are human and we have our own thoughts and feelings. We can be prejudice and make assumptions based on appearance or stereotype.

Are we not judged that way?

Many on our path are made feel they are wrong because we do not worship as other religions do.

I too have made assumptions and they have not always been right. Mostly I have learned from them and grown a little wiser. Then after all isn't that the goal of our way, to seek wisdom and to grow from it.

Recently I was changed. As a solitary I was unprepared for what I experienced and for the effects of sharing with so many the Rites. I came away with renewed conviction and devotion to the Goddess and the God. Each morning I have walked for thirty minutes and then spent some time in the local park either in meditation or contemplation of the wonders of Nature. Then I have spent time writing in my Book of Shadows. It is wonderful to feel so connected and to be learning even more about the Gods and the path I have chosen.

I am still solitary and would hope to connect with others with whom I can meet and share and learn from. I am Proud to be who I am. I am an eclectic pagan and I am a witch. I believe in the Goddess and the God in all

their forms and in the Magick that connects all of us together.

It was fitting that for me all these changes began with Ostara a time of rebirth and new beginnings for us. I have touched the earth and felt the energy. I have stood on the grass and felt the Sun God's warmth heat my face. I have listened to the breeze at night and heard the Goddess as she shared her wisdom.

I have watched the sky light up with the energy of the universe and the fire glow as the breeze fed it's flames. The smallest flower a wondrous proof of the God and Goddess working together.

Paganism shows us many things bit what is the most valuable lesson we can learn?

It is to love. To love he Goddess for Her grace and beauty. To love the God for His strength and wisdom. To love the world for it is our home in this life. To love each other for inside everyone dwells the Goddess and the God and lastly; to love ourselves. To accept who we are and find happiness in our existance. The Goddess and God want us to enjoy life. To be apart of it. It is easy to be separated from things, especially here online. But even here the Gods guide us if we choose to listen.

Chapter Two: On General Ethical Priorities

• The Multiverse is very large!
• Lifestyle is more important that credo.
• Intent is more important than results.
• People are more important than property.
• Discipline is more important than control.
• Survival is more important than comfort.
• Creation is better than criticism.
• Destruction is better than complaint.
• Unity is better than dissension.
• Individuality is better than conformity.
• Responsibility is better than blame.
• Remorse is better than guilt.
• Sensuality is better than asceticism.
• Love is better than hate.
• Caution is better than fear.
• Courage is better than foolhardiness.
• Knowledge is better than ignorance.
• Self-knowledge is better than pride.
• Wisdom is better than knowledge.
• Honesty is better than deceit.
• Honor is better than arrogance.
• Peace is better than war.
• Joy is better than sorrow.
• Generosity is better than thrift.
• Mercy is better than justice.
• Loyalty is better than slavery.
• Trust is better than cynicism.
• Skepticism is better than gullibility.
• Good works are better than good promises.

Today I am struggling. I am trying to find away to balance what is required of me in the academic world and what my heart wants to write. I recognize that have become a much better writer and reader due to my MFA program and I am almost half way to graduation.

 The dilemma I am having is, I am dissatisfied with my manuscript.

 My advisor found themes of motherhood throughout my work. This is something I never would have pieced together. For that I am thankful. I saw other patterns, but not this one. Yet, it makes sense. I am a mother and I am very drawn to mother Goddesses. I look at their images to find a connection, to inquire within myself what is my role and how can I best walk this path, in a way that is beneficial to everyone including myself.

 I held to the belief that as my daughters got older that this role would wane. It hasn’t. In fact it seems to have increased. My daughters are both in the place of becoming independent—yet they teeter back and forth, between needing my support to wanting to stand on their own without any back up. They don’t always welcome my assistance, yet they want me available on their terms. I think this is normal, a part of growing up. I struggle to help, but not take over. It is not easy to watch them make decisions that do not appear to be in their best interest. Yet is through mistakes that we learn.

 My manuscript is filled with these sorts of stories, the dilemmas I have had in raising them within the complexities of our society. It is not easy raising caring loving children when what is mirrored back to them through the media is greed, celebrity lifestyles and people behaving badly.

 I struggle with how to walk in this world as a grounded human being and yet embrace a magical life. For me the balance is a very fine line that often blurs. I have kept hidden a lot of the Wiccan/Pagan experiences that played a huge part in how I raised my children.

 When I enrolled in the MFA I was very excited to be accepted—to be given the chance to write. Yet, there isn’t always room for what I want to write. I find that I am curtailing a lot of my experiences so that they appear to fit more into what a publisher might want. To me, my works appears a bit cardboard-cut-out like because I am hiding parts of myself—not hiding really—more like down playing.

 I am trying to come to terms with either leaving the program and writing whatever is on my heart or finding a way to express myself in an authentic way within the confines of academia. I don’t want to cut off my nose to spite my face. Yet, my desire is different from most MFA students. I don’t aspire to teach at a University. I aspire to write non-fiction articles, articles that are more geared for the Wiccan/Pagan community and publish a book or two. This college is very pricey— but, as I stated earlier, it has helped in a lot of ways. I now notice themes, styles, and crafting in my work and the works of other, that I never would have been able to pick out had I not enrolled. Mostly what I have gleaned is the craft aspect, which I needed to understand and be able to use no matter what I write.

What I read has a much broader scope and it has branched out in many directions, which has caused me to look at life thru a much wider lens.

I don't have a clear understanding if I have learned what I needed and its now time to move forward on my own or if I need to hunker down and finish what I started. I am at an impasse. I am not sure if I need to scale the wall, stare it down, or forge a new path.

I am leaning towards scaling the wall- finishing. It won’t harm me in anyway to complete this program. In some cases it may help with publication. Today I am struggling to find the answer.

Roman pagans first introduced the holiday of Saturnalia, a week long period of lawlessness celebrated between December 17 - 25.  Roman courts were closed and Roman law dictated that no one could be punished for damaging property or injuring people.  This was the beginning of Christmas, for Christmas beget from the Saturnalia festivals.

Saturnalia was a festive holiday when Romans worshipped their sun god, Saturn.  The festival began when Roman authorities chose "an enemy" of the Roman people to represent the "Lord of Misrule."  Each Roman community selected an innocent victim whom they forced to indulge in food and other physical pleasures throughout the week.  On December 25th, Roman authorities believed they were destroying the forces of darkness by brutally murdering this innocent being.

The type of traditions that went on during this festival were widespread intoxication, singing naked from house to house, rape and other sexual license, and consuming human-shaped biscuits known today as Gingerbread cookies.

THE PAGAN CHRISTMAS TREE

Pagans had long worshipped trees in and from the forests.  They also brought them into their homes, decorated them, and placed presents under the tree in celebration to their god, Adonis.

In Babylon, the evergreen tree came to represent the birth and reincarnation of Nimrod as his new son, Tammuz.  A feast was held in honor of him on December 25, observed as the day that Nimrod (reincarnated apparently) reappeared on earth, as he had been killed and "reborn" on that day, victorious over death.  It was called the "Birthday of the Unconquered Son."  Is this beginning to sound familiar now?

Jeremiah 10:1-5, "Here year the word which the Lord speaketh unto you, O house of Israel:  Thus saith the Lord, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them.  For the customs of the people are in vain:  for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe.   They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and hammers, that it move not.  They are upright as the palm tree, but speak not:  they must needs be borne, because they cannot go.  Be not afraid of them; for they cannot do evil, neither is it also in them to do good." 

THE WREATH AND THE MISTLETOE

In pagan mythology, evergreen means eternal life and a never-dying existance.  Saturnalia wreaths were round, representing the female sex organ and is considered a fertility symbol.  The well-known Christmas candle that people light is representing the male sex organ.  Hence the reason why candle's are placed inside Christmas wreaths.

The Druids were pagan Celtic priests who were considered magicians and wizards.  The mistletoe represented the false "messiah," considered by the Druids to be a divine branch that had dropped from heaven and grew up on a tree on earth.  The mistletoe symbolized there conciliation between the gods and man.  And since a kiss the well known symbol of reconciliation, that is how "kissing under the mistletoe" became a custom -- both were tokens of reconciliation.  The mistletoe, being a sacred plant and a symbol of fertility, was also believed to contain certain magical powers.  It was supposed to bring "good luck" and fertility, and even to protect from witchcraft the house in which it hung.

CHRISTMAS HISTORY DOESN'T MATTER? . . . YOU JUST WANT TO CELEBRATE JESUS' BIRTH, RIGHT?

Sorry, folks, the origins of things are important.  God is perfect and in the Bible, He was very clear on receiving only offerings that were untainted and pure.  And Christmas is filled with taint.  You are performing in so many Satanic and pagan traditions, while you're "celebrating Jesus' birthday" that you're not even aware of it.  And is Christmas really about giving?  So many people go into debt this holiday because they can't spend less than $100 on a gift, because any less would be "cheap" or "unacceptable" to their family members, loved ones, friends, etc.

If it was about Jesus' birthday, then just read the story, talk about Jesus coming and dying and be done with it.  What's with the lights, the tree, the presents?  But let me ask you this:  Where in the Bible does it say to celebrate Jesus' birthday every year?  To remember his birth every year on a certain day, when in all reality this season is really about you receiving the most gifts, and spending time with family because you just have to even though you don't want to?  Jesus said to remember His death, and that's done by taking the Lord's supper.

Galatians 4:9-11, "But now, after that ye have known God, or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, where unto ye desire to be in bondage?  Ye observe days, months, and times, and years.  I am afraid of you, lest I have bestowed upon you labour in vain."

Why does it matter?  Because it is important that we know where things come from and be conscious of what we celebrate and do.  First, so that we understand that we are not dipping into things of Satanic roots and second, that we're knowledgable about these things so that we can help teach others.

Hosea 4:6, "My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee . . ."

The first night we arrived at the house late, after the boxes had been moved from storage to the house.  After ordering pizza, (something I don't care to eat again any time soon) I was too tired to put the bed together.  I made a bed on the soft carpet and finally settled in. As is I suppose common in a new place, I slept very little and an aching leg finally brought me out of bed before sunrise. The dog and I ventured outside and I found myself gazing at a sky so filled with stars it was as if jewels were falling from the sky.  It was a gift, I think, of the new moon, reminding me that the no matter where I go, these things will always be a part of me.  What we carry within us can never be lost, only misplaced, waiting to find the way back perhaps on a starry night.